Actually, I'm just in it for the money

So I'm sitting here in the lobby of my esteemed legal institution, doing my level best to hock tickets to the Equal Justice Foundation Auction... ok, let's be honest here, my "level best" amounts to occasionally looking up and trying to will people over to the table to support me by spending their money.

So what is the Equal Justice Foundation Auction? Well, the Equal Justice Foundation (EJF) is a public interest organization here at the law school that promotes public interest work by giving out $3000 grants to students who do unpaid, public interest legal work during the summer. The Auction is where the EJF gets most of the funding for said grants. Unfortunately, the good people at EJF don't actually just give these grants away to any unpaid, summer public interest worker. They require all applicants to help, in some small way, to put the Auction together. "Some small way" of course translates into "no less than 10 hours" and so here I sit, trying to hock tickets to fulfill my requirement and qualify for that shiny shiny grant.

So come to the Auction! It'll be fun! Free drinks! Free food! Neat stuff! Wahoo!



Am on my way north again after spending the night in a Barrow Down. It was... cold. Definately not going on my list of "great places to stay." Ah well, at least I got this shiney new sword. Total thus far: 116 miles.

*ominous thunder*

Ugh. Ok, so last week was pretty much spent working on the memo *ominous thunder*. What is the memo *ominous thunder*? WELL. The memo *ominous thunder* actually refers to the most current iteration of massive, crazy, insane, 30+% of your grade in legal rhetoric (research and writing) writing assignments. This particular the memo *ominous thunder* was our very first opportunity for creative (persuasive) writing and, like all of the previous iterations of the memo *ominous thunder*, pretty much consumed our lives for the past few weeks.

Naturally, all the real work got done the night before, because each iteration of the memo *ominous thunder* seems to have some sort of built in inhibitor that prevents real understanding of what the assignment’s true purpose until no less than 24 hours before it is due.

You see, this legal writing thing really isn’t that hard. It is highly formulaic and logical, each point following the very simple “conclusion, rule of law, proof of rule, application of rule to the current case, restatement of conclusion” format and honestly is very straightforward. But for some unfathomable reason, it is just terribly difficult to do and however easy it is to explain how to write the memo *ominous thunder*, actually doing it is a whole different story.

the memo *ominous thunder*

Ok, sorry, that was unnecessary.

the memo *ominous thunder*

And that was totally over the top.

the memo *ominous thunder*

Getting old Erik…

the AAAAGH, GET IT OFF ME! OW! HEY! PUT THAT BACK, IT LOOKS IMPORTANT!

...

*ominous silence*

Better.

So what else… umm, actually, I should probably work. I’ll tell you about helping to found a new student group (because, really, I don’t have enough to do) and my brother’s summer plans later.

Ok, got lost several more times, escaped from the tree that tried to eat me, met the overly happy dude in the garish clothes, and am now happily on my way to the Barrow Downs. Great. Y'know, I can't help but feel that this whole thing would be easier if we just stayed on the damn ROAD! But nooooo! We have to avoid the immortal, freakishly strong dudes in the funky cloaks. *sigh*

Ok, I've come 108 miles so far, behind schedule, but making progress.

Stormtroopers? Here? ... Oh no, I've been shot!

Does anyone else see the irony of VP Darth Cheney shooting someone while out hunting on the Body of Christ? Who the heck names their town Corpus Christi anyway? I really have to wonder if they stopped to think about what those words they probably recited every Sunday in church meant. I mean, what would happen if, one day, the local priest ran out of communion wafers and transubstantiated the whole town?

Ok, enough blasphemous sillyness, I must read.

I got a new button!

So, for those of you who knew/saw me during 2004, you might recall a particular button that I wore all the time. You know the one: it was blue, it said “Kerry” on it… yeah, that one. Well, as you may recall, the whole Kerry thing didn’t really turn out so well, but fear not for I remain undaunted! I have a NEW button now and while it’s not quite as blue as the last one, I’m definitely more excited about the guy whose name is on it.

*imagine there is a picture of me and my new button right here, someday there will be, I swear*

If you’ve been following along, you should be able to guess whose button I am now sporting, but in case you haven’t I will give you a hint. This is my constitutional law professor, the same guy who sprung Cindy Sheehan out of jail after the Capitol Police arrested her for wearing a t-shirt in the House chamber during the State of the Union address. Last night was the first big fundraiser of his campaign and I was out directing traffic and collecting donations from people as they walked into this great big coffee shop in Silver Spring (northeast of the District). The event itself was a bunch of local writers and poets (some of whom were law profs, others who were nationally syndicated) who got up and read some of their material, much of which was very enjoyable, but the really impressive thing was the turnout. As most of you (the ones who don’t live under rocks) have probably heard we (being most of the people on the mid-Atlantic coast and most of New England) also had a tiny little snowstorm last night. Now, to be perfectly honest I thought it was fantastic, but I’m also a born and bred Midwesterner whose ancestors were the barbarian tribes that went back to the frozen north after conquering Rome because it’s way to f%*# (for no apparent reason, this post is going to have a PG rating, let’s see how long it lasts) hot in Italy during the summer… which apparently skews my opinion somewhat.

Right, so the impressive thing was, even though the city was more or less shut down, the majority of the populace cowering in their homes where the big, bad snowflakes couldn’t get them, we still got something like 200+ people (my estimate) and raised $20,000+ (actual estimate). We are SO gonna kick ass in September.

Other than that, it’s been a pretty dull week. I went and got sick again (meaning I had that annoying cough and stuffy head thing that everyone else seems to have) and while I never did go to the doctor the last time I got sick, just because these symptoms are pretty much identical to my last illness doesn’t mean anything at all, I’m sure it’s just a coincidence. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. So yeah, I did actually go to the doctor this time and he gave me some wicked strong antibiotics (Doc: “you’ve had this cough for how many weeks?” Me: “err, several, it’s not debilitating, just annoying?” Doc: *sigh* “I’d better prescribe something strong then.” Me: “um, please put down that scalpel.” Doc: “shush, I need some blood to unlock the seal on the ‘special’ cabinet where we keep the really good stuff. Oh, I’ll need a virgin sacrifice too.” Me: “well shit, there goes the PG rating.”), and I feel much better now. Why did I go to the doctor this time you ask? Is there some specific reason my desire to be non-contagious suddenly trumps my aversion to spending three hours at that damn health center?

Maybe.

Aw crap. See, I knew this Old Forest thing was a bad idea. I’m trying to go north. NORTH damn it! But this path keeps going southeast. Stupid trees. How far have I come? 88 miles. How far do I have to go? 370 miles.

*grumble* Stupid elves building their stupid last strongholds against the coming shadow in the stupid mountains instead of on this nice, indefensible plain.

That damn wiretapping fiasco

Ok, I feel compelled to rant. Not because I still haven't finished my draft, really, I swear.

The president's wiretapping is either illegal, or the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act (FISA) is unconstitutional. Congress made an explicit declaration of its intent with respect to clandestine wiretapping with the original passage of FISA and then reaffirmed it in the specific context of combatting terrorism with the amendments they made to FISA in the Patriot Act. The Authorization of the Use of Military Force (AUMF) does not eclipse FISA because FISA is explicit on this issue whereas the AUMF is not and clear legislative statements trump inferences. If Congress has specifically forbidden the president to act, then the president can legally ignore that prohibition only if it infringes on his exclusive constitutional powers, which I believe would then make FISA itself unconstitutional for daring to infringe upon the exclusive domain of another branch of government.

The president has asserted that FISA "does not apply," but it is not within the power of the president to decide whether or not a law applies to certain circumstances, that is the excusive domain of the court. The president may only assert that congress has overstepped its authority and then deliberately ignore the law, but just because the president says or asserts something does not make it true; only the court can decide when and where the law applies.

So the president's claim then boils down to the constitutionality of FISA with respect to his exclusive powers as Commander in Chief (CiC). If warrantless wiretapping is "inherent" to the CiC, then certainly FISA could not infringe upon that power, but this application of the role of CiC is itself extremely suspect if not outright unconstitutional. The claim that the CiC can suspend the 4th Amendment's protection against against unreasonable searches and seizures, absent the direst of emergencies and immediate dangers to the security of the country, is supported by no law. Given a clear indication of an immanent terrorist attack, the president could certainly claim vast powers to intervene and prevent that event, but trying to assert that the US has been in immediate danger of a terrorist attack, continuously, for FOUR YEARS exceeds all claims of reasonability. FISA grants the president 15 days after a catastrophe to gather whatever information he wants without oversight, and allows him to ask for extensions, but FISA requires that oversight eventually be applied.

Basically, as I see it, this has little to do with legality and everything to do with WILL. Bush has overstepped his powers by asserting a radical interpretation of his power as CiC. This is a huge power grab by the Executive branch. The "debate" is whether or not the Legislative branch will let him get away with it.

What bugs me about the coverage of this fiasco is that few seem to be thinking and commenting about what little we do know. We know that the software used to conduct this surveilance listens to calls to and from certain countries and the US, only recording those calls that set off certain warnings. Traditional wiretapping involves listening in on a known suspect's communications in hopes of finding evidence. This new application listens in on everyone's communications in hopes of finding suspects. What is to prevent this program from being expanded to pure domestic-domestic calls? All that would be required are a few program modifications, nobody need ever know. And without oversight nobody ever will.



Ok, glad to have that off my chest, please feel free to weigh in on this if you are so inclined.

I got a JOB! (or "avoiding my rhetoric assignment")

"Rhetoric" is what we call our first year legal research and writing course here at WCL. It's only 2 credit hours per semester, but it's easily more stressful and frustrating and any of my 3 or 4 credit courses.

So I've got a paper due a week from Monday and I'm supposed to produce a draft of the first few bits by tomorrow afternoon. It's not really all that bad, it won't take all that long once I get started, but I am finding my motivation at a particularly low ebb right now. Strange that I can effortlessly produce way more than the page limit of the final draft (12 pages) in the form of blog posts, emails, and IM converstaions in a single evening than I can for this paper in two days. Actually, it's not that strange at all.

You see, rhetoric is supposedly especially important for that first year job hunt, but I've already got a job lined up for the summer.

*fanfare*

Yeah, I got a job. I'll be working for Kohn, Kohn and Colapinto who, despite being a private firm, are decidedly NOT evil. They've got a fantastic internship program (unpaid, but then almost all first-year summer jobs are for law students) and so I get to learn the ropes of my new profession in the context of doing work that I actually care about. I'm giddy.

I am on a path in the Old Forest, two miles past the Bonfire Glade. Total to date: 80 miles.

Assorted states

Ok, ok, I'll post about the damn state of the union already.

Yes I watched it, yes I was appalled, yes I think I might actually know what the hell he meant by "human/animal hybrids," but only because I'm a big geek. Mostly I just drank wine while listening to him shovel shit for 50 minutes. Between my roommate and myself, we counted about 20 instances of "freedom" and 22 of "terror" or "terrorist" which is actually lower than I expected. I'll give him props for his education initiatives if he actually follows through and comes up with a way to teach kids science and math... I'll give him even more props if he can show me that he can do long division without a calculator.

But here's the really cool part about the speech. You heard that Cindy Sheehan got an invite to the speech, but got arrested in the House chamber? She was wearing a t-shirt that said "2245 dead, how many more?" or something to that effect, and the cops hauled her away when she refused to cover it up because there is a very old law that forbids protest within the Capitol building. Without even going into the irony of this prohibition of free speech in the very center of our democracy, her arrest was total crap. T-shirts with suggestive slogans are not a form of protest that is restricted by any law (remember the kid in Detroit who wore the "Bush = terrorist" shirt that won in court?) and it's very suspicious that DC police, who probably deal with more protesters than any other police department in the country, would not know that distinction.

Ah well. That's not the best part. The reason this story merits a post (like I really need a reason) is because after she got arrested, Sheehan could not get ahold of her lawyer. This in itself isn't that interesting, except that the person she called after giving up on her lawyer turned out to be my constitutional law prof! In his non-law professor life he specializes in first amendment law and apparently has enough notoriety that someone gave Sheehan his number as "the guy" to call when she was in trouble. My prof made a few calls and got her out of jail, and now I get to claim that I'm one degree of separation from Cindy Sheehan... or is it two? I forget, is it zero degrees if you know the person, or if you ARE the person?

This is why I love living in Washington.

Oh, and as another fine example of why I love living in Washington, guess who I got to talk to last night. Bob Woodward. You know, the Woodward of "Woodward and Bernstein" who broke Watergate? Yeah. Not that we had an in-depth exchange or anything, I just got to stand at a mic and ask him a question after he gave a lecture on national security and the Iraq war, but he did tell me that my question was "very well articulated" so I get to brag that I met Bob Woodward and he thinks I'm articulate. Yeah, it's all about spin baby. Maybe I should put that on my resume.

Ok, gotta crash. Sooo much to do this weekend. Apparently there are these "job" thingys that we're supposed to get for the summer and Washington is something of a popular place for law students for some unfathomable reason. Personally I think it's probably the ducks in the reflecting pool.

Right, so where the hell am I now? *looks around* Hmm, I seem to have just gone through some sort of hedge and am now surrounded by trees. Hey! I'm out of the Shire! Which means that I'm... err... in the Old Forest. Aw crap, where the hell did the path go? Damn you entwives and your machinations! Total to date: 75 miles.